When your teen breaks your trust, there's a better way to handle it
Yesterday, I discovered a voice memo from 13 years ago that brought me to my knees.
It was a conversation with my son, then 13, that I had somehow recorded. The kind of conversation that haunts you as a parent—the one you wish you could do over.
I had given him what he desperately wanted: independence—the freedom to stay home alone. But then I discovered he had broken my trust. He had biked to the grocery store without telling anyone, spent $20 on junk food after promising to make better choices, and was oddly vague about where the money came from.
I started the conversation calmly, determined to handle it "right." But as the lies unfolded, frustration crept in. Then came the words I can never take back: "I don't trust you, and I don't believe you."
In that recording, I heard it – the moment his spirit crumbled. The heavy silence that followed. The sound of shame washing over my child.
Listening to it now, tears streamed down my face. I wept for my son, whose self-worth I had chipped away at. And I felt deep compassion for that younger version of myself, a mom who cared so much but lacked the tools to handle this moment differently.
Maybe you've recently discovered missing homework assignments, found hidden messages that made your stomach drop, or smelled something in their room that made your heart race. I know that pit in your stomach, that feeling of "What do I do now?"
Here's what I've learned: When we focus solely on stopping the behavior, we miss what's really happening in their heart, their mind, their world.
Today, I help parents uncover the root cause of these behaviors. Because when you understand what's driving your teen's choices, everything shifts. The defiance melts away. The walls come down. And most importantly? Your child starts seeing you as their safe harbor, not their prosecutor.
♥️ Jeanine
➡️ P.S. Ready to transform your relationship with your teen? Book a Parenting Breakthrough Call today. You'll receive:
✅ A personalized assessment of your unique situation
✅ One powerful communication tool you can start using immediately
✅ A clear roadmap to rebuild trust and connection with your teen
You'll leave our conversation knowing exactly what to do next, with renewed hope and confidence that things can change.
