Do you know what your teen needs?

Parents naturally focus on their teen’s behavior.

Why are they always on TikTok?
Why aren’t they studying?
Why are they eating junk food?
Why aren’t they hanging out with friends?
Why are they so rude?

Along the way you learned that being a “good” parent means your child needs to behave the “right way.”

So when you are concerned about what they say or do, you assume something is wrong with them.

Naturally, you fall into the trap of thinking:

You’re lazy.
You’re disrespectful.
You’re self-centered.
You’re a liar.

You have expectations and your teen is not meeting them.

Your teen senses your disappointment and pulls away because it feels awful.

Let’s break this cycle. 

Here’s the truth:

👉 Your teen’s behavior is a consequence of an uncomfortable feeling they don’t know how to get rid of.

So they act out because they don’t have the words to express themselves.

Instead of your correction, judgment, or punishment, notice what they need and how they are feeling.

That’s the real magic.

When they struggle with a friendship, they need you to listen.

When they feel pressure from school, they need you to be compassionate.

When they feel like a loser for missing a goal, they need you to be on their side.

When they have self-doubt, they need you to tell them you believe in them.

When you identify and meet their needs, their behavior will change.

They will make better choices.

They will build self-confidence. 

You will raise a healthy teen.

And you will feel close again.

♥️ Jeanine

P.S. This is tricky because we weren’t taught how to parent this way. I can help you. Book a free call and let’s talk.

P.P.S. Head on over to Instagram for more parenting strategies.

“Meet their needs rather than demand they meet your expectations.” —Dr. Gabor Maté