How to Edit Your Parenting Playbook to Get Better Results

Do you have a parenting playbook, or a set of standards, for how children are supposed to behave? Most of us do. 

It might look something like this:

• Respect me and my rules.

• Love and appreciate me.

• Follow my direction.

• Be a good student.

• Share your thoughts and feelings.

• Hang out with the family.

• Do your chores without being asked.

• Have an interest outside of school.

• Let me help you.

While this playbook looks perfectly reasonable, when these subconscious expectations are not met, disappointment and irritation sets in.

Your child feels this energy.

They think they are upsetting you and don’t know why.

They feel like a failure. 

So how do you right the ship? 

You want to raise a happy, thriving, independent adult and you think your playbook is the solution.

I would like to offer an alternative way of thinking that works wonders for my clients.

Focus on your child’s attributes, not their actions.

It might look something like this:

• You are friendly.

• You are thoughtful.

• You are funny.

• You are resilient.

• You are empathetic.

• You are optimistic.

• You are charismatic.

• You are creative.

• You are introspective.

Draw your thoughts and attention to their strengths. 

Think about all the things they are doing well.

Share these thoughts with them. 

Your new playbook is about who they are, not what they do. Each child has unique gifts and abilities. When those gifts are nourished, acknowledged, and celebrated, the possibilities are endless.

➡️ They will feel your unconditional love and pride.
➡️ Their confidence will rise.
➡️ They will communicate with you more freely.
➡️ They will enjoy spending time with you.
➡️ There will be calm and peace in your home.
➡️ You are building the foundation for your child to experience a well-lived life.

Focus on what you currently love about your child and make that enough.

P.S. If you’re ready for my help, reach out via email, and we can discuss exactly how I can support you to create the communication and connection you are looking for.

P.P.S. If you want to dive deeper and engage with me, head on over to Instagram

“Accept the children the way we accept trees with gratitude, because they are a blessing, but do not have expectations or desires. You don’t expect trees to change, you love them as they are.”
–Isabel Allende