How to Get Off Your Young Adult’s Emotional Rollercoaster

When you are in parent mode, your child’s mood can rub off on you.

Let’s say they walk in from school in a bad mood. Maybe they don’t want to talk about their day. Or they snap at you when you ask a question. They might have an absent look, and their energy is low.

You are annoyed because you want to hear about what they learned. You feel your blood pressure rising because their tone was disrespectful. Now, the last thing you feel like doing for them is cooking dinner or watching their soccer game.

You hopped on their ride of negativity. Now, you are in a bad mood. You are less playful. You are less patient. You are less caring.

It’s an emotional rollercoaster that you really don’t want to be on. 

Your listening skills shut down. You walk away frustrated. You disconnect from them.

It’s perfectly natural to pull back your tenderness when you feel disrespected. However, you become the parent you don’t want to be.

Instead, what you can do is choose compassion.

Compassion gets you out of your head and into your heart. 

Generate empathy by thinking about what your child might be going through. Drop your frustration and get curious about why they seem so low. Don’t take their mood personally by recognizing young adults are still learning how to manage their emotions.

These thoughts create a safe space for your child to share with you when they are ready. 
These thoughts communicate to your child that you love them unconditionally.
These thoughts generate love and connection between the two of you.

And the benefit to you is: more energy, less exhaustion, and a healthier wellbeing overall.

You parent from a place of calm, empathy, and positivity. This new mood also affects your child but in a completely different way. 

They will feel comfortable opening up and sharing with you. 
You start building the momentum of more and more positive interactions. 
You continually show up as an empathetic listener who guides them off the emotional rollercoaster. 

You help to raise a calm, confident, and thriving adult.

Ups and downs are normal in the lives of teens, but you don’t need to hop on their emotional rollercoaster. Stay by their side, ready to offer compassion, and enjoy the ride!

P.S. Continually choosing compassion is challenging. In our private coaching session, I can help you with this. Reach out and let’s partner.

“Compassion is about giving all the love that you’ve got.” 
—Cheryl Strayed